Each year, the Oxford American Dictionary names a neologism the “word of the year,” and this year it’s “unfriend,” a verb that means “to remove a friend from a social networking site.” Pretty underwhelming. I think we can do better.
Last week, Hyewon and David each wrote a post that registered some anxiety about the academic job market. They reminded me that I need to jazz up my CV if I want to be among the mere 50% of the English Ph.D.s who receive a tenured professorship. Unfortunately, I have no authentic edge over my brilliant competitors, so I have to stretch. How about a new CV section, one that no one else will have? “Neologisms Coined; or, My Personal Impact on the American Lexicon.” Arranged chronologically, it will elaborate all the word inventions and new usages I have helped pioneer.
Rough Draft
2000: “seinfeld” [verb]: to interpret a real-life occurrence through the lens of the sitcom Seinfeld. Often pejorative, meaning to analyze complex situations reductively in order to conform them to the plot-lines of a sitcom. E.g. “This is the kind of situation that simply cannot be seinfelded.”
2006: “prebound” [verb]: to actively seek a new partner while still in a relationship; to delay a breakup until a rebound relationship is within view. E.g. “I think Jeffrey and Tara will break up as soon as one of them finds someone new. They’re both obviously prebounding.”
2009: “oblogation” [noun]: the obligation to contribute to a blog, often attached to a job or a casual agreement. E.g. “The workload is light, except for a twice-a-week oblogation.” Or “I was excited to contribute to Antonio’s blog at first, but it’s become a burdensome oblogation.”
Well, that ought to impress the hiring committees, right? There’s more work to be done with this inadequate language of ours, though. Here’s a list of phenomena that still need words: when you introduce yourself to someone you’ve already met several times; when you realize halfway through telling a long story that you’re being rather dull; the weird but delightful way people act on an unseasonably warm winter day; etc. Any suggestions? Any words you’ve coined or repurposed?
And, how about a word for a blog post that’s gone on too long?
A friend of a friend on facebook just put forth these two words “procrastachievement” and “provoidance” — they each refer to doing something productive (such as laundry or in my case, formatting citations) as a way of procrastinating or avoiding the “real” work.
I wonder what the foreigners among us have to say about this. I suspect many of us created new words in the process of learning English. One of my creations that I proudly stand by is “feet fingers.” It just makes so much more sense than this bizarre word “toes”…
I say, go, Talia! Sorry for coming to your post rather late. (I see you wrote it last year!
Oblogation, no oblogation, I like following our blogs, and it’s time to get back to Cac.ophony, come new year and new semester!
I feel hopelessly left behind, reading your delightful post, by the way. I am still shocked by Jennifer Aniston’s comment on Angelina Jolie’s revelations about the beginnings of the Brangelina saga. (Yes, I am fascinated by Americana.) Aniston referred to Jolie’s account as “uncool,” and I jumped thinking, there you go butchering the language, too, Hollywood! That was 2005 or 2006, or so.
Agnieszka, dear, I love that “foreigners among us” line. You threw me into another identity-crisis right there….